“Now we understand that the blanket really does protect Linus and that Schroeder really does play lovely music on a toy piano, because both of them keep at it. They believe.” – Anne Lamott
Here I am, back again at the subject of faith. Belief. It’s a recurring theme in my life. Always has been. Ever since my mom put me in Catholic school for first grade and I was suddenly submerged in this vast culture I knew nothing about, but was rooted in this thing called faith. Where we went to church every day and all the other kids bowed their heads when the priest told them it was time to pray. They knew when to sit and stand and kneel and I just followed along, trying to figure it out as I went along.
I remember in second grade when the rest of the class was gearing up to start the first communion classes (which I was allowed to watch, but not partake in as I had never been baptized). I struggled with watching my classmates learn and take on this tradition, walking in the well-worn footsteps of their families before them, to figure out what the tradition had to do with the concept of faith. There seemed to me, to be a great disconnect between the two. The tradition was walking the walk, but I didn’t understand how that walking translated into talking the talk.
I like to think that I’ve learned a bit more about faith since then. Although I have to admit that I’d be hard pressed to put it into words right about now. Right now I am simply focusing on being present in the moment. Being grateful for being able to breathe in and out and put one foot in front of the other every day. I think the role faith plays for me right now is trusting that I am exactly where I am supposed to be. My walking right now is paying attention to where I am and what there is for me to learn here. My talking right now is believing that the walking will eventually get me to where I want and need to be.
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