Choose your Choice

There’s a woman on TV right now whose name is Kiki. And I wonder if that’s her real name. I mean did her parents actually find that name in a book or conversation or movie and think “Oh! I love that name! We should name our daughter that!” Is that how those names happen?

And now there is a man throwing away a garbage bag full of money. And I know it’s supposed to be a funny and poignant comment on how quickly we all throw away our money on overpriced cell phone services or cars or whatever. But mostly I just think it’s silly. There was a room full of people who were paid large sums of money to come up with that ad campaign which is actually trite and anything but poignant. It’s a commercial for Christ’s sake. Is that what we’re supposed to take as truth now?

There are middle-aged moderately handsome men telling me that pills can improve my husband’s sex life. That simply by taking this little blue pill he can suddenly meet all of my unspoken needs and his own. It has nothing to do with me of course, I don’t have to do anything but lie there afterwards and relish in the aftereffects.

I’m frustrated and angry today. By the attachment to convention that this world seems to demand. By the people who squint their eyes good naturedly and cock their heads to one side whenever I get on one of my tangents about romance or hope or fairytales. By the fact that I am one of those people.

I watched Revolutionary Road today and I think it’s a very brave movie with a character that has tremendous courage. Some say she was a coward. That her choices were cop outs and that she selfishly ignored her responsibilities in some foolish quest to be happy.

And every moment of every day is all about choice. The choice to embrace or embellish or face with disdain. The choice to put on a brave face or refuse to suck it up any longer. The choice to be or become.
What will my choice be today or tomorrow or right now?